In my own experience and the experience of those around me, I have noticed one glaringly obvious commonality. When it comes to split second decisions or giving immediate answers, young people struggle. This ability to think on our toes and make an executive decision without the input of anyone else or time to weigh the options, seems to be a challenging feat for many quarter lifers. I’ve bored my loved ones with my theories and overthinking about why this is, so I decided it’s time to write it out.
Think about how often you receive a text, email, or Facebook message, read it, and then put it away for later. I do this everyday. How often do you call someone up and ask them to do something that evening or meet you somewhere in that moment? I can’t remember the last time I did this. What I’m getting at is that it is a common occurrence today to be granted tons of time to respond to others or make a choice about something. Unless your job specifically requires you to make split second decisions, you probably aren’t exercising that ‘in the moment’ confidence.
I was floored when I actually began thinking of how real this theory has become. I rarely give someone a direct answer even about coffee date plans because I need to check my calendar but what I think it really is is taking that comfortable cushion time in deciding if I can commit to it. We’re comforted by the ability to put our phones away and save getting back to that text for later. I bet some of us go for a full day sometimes with having ample time to respond to each piece of communication that comes our way. I just don’t know how this can be a healthy way to operate 90% of the time. I think it’s crucial to exercise the ‘think on your feet’ part of your brain. This could very well be the cause of all of the indecisive quarter lifers and young people today. I feel like I’ve cracked the code!!
Even the whole notion of communicating via text for majority of our conversations contributes to this. We curate our answers to everything and can delete and rewrite our responses as many times as we’d like. And then it feels jarring when we are expected to respond in person or have a difficult conversation over the phone. This can lead to feelings of anxiety or doubt in ourselves because it’s not a skill we’re in tune with.
I challenge you to practice your in the moment decision making and response giving. Don’t put your phone down and maul it over, dial that person’s number and have the chat in real time. I know you could argue the other side which is that having time to respond can diffuse negative automatic responses but all in moderation people! All in moderation. It’s important to know how to do both because real life doesn’t wait for you to rewrite your texts. I hope you accept my tough love with open arms.
So this is my intro to the theme I’ll be working with over the next couple weeks.
That’s right. This is for all of you who don’t know what’s next, can’t make a decision for the life of you, and get anxiety about big, fat life decisions. I’m ready to give you some tools for exercising your decision making skills, looking inward to find the confidence in choosing what’s next, and turn your aimless in aimful (not a word but I don’t care).
Missed you guys!