A couple months spent away from the pages of my blog has given me time to reflect. Well, at least that was my initial intention for the pause. But then as the days crept into weeks and the weeks into months, I found myself second guessing posting again. I started to allow self-doubting thoughts into my mind. The exact thoughts I help my clients and community to overcome.
After just under a year of working within this wellness and self-help industry, I felt swallowed up. I looked around to see so many brilliant people doing brilliant things – saying what I want to say, and in my mind, saying it better.
I wondered if what I was doing mattered or was worth putting out there when people can get something seemingly more valuable elsewhere. I can’t say that I’m back to a place where I have full power over these self-sabotaging thoughts but I’m feeling better.
And I’m writing again.
I wanted to share this with you because I think that this feeling, this self-doubt, is a common outcome when we start to ground our roots in something new. It’s intimidating to feel brand new, inexperienced, and small. Like you’re getting swept up, bombarded by information, suggestions, and decisions. And feeling fearful. Like really, really fearful. Your mind begins to sound like…’Is this right for me?’ …’Can I do this?’ …’How will I ever be that good?’
Let’s find ways to sit with the fear – to sit with the discomfort and insecurity. I’m not sure I have the best recipe for this yet but when I do, you’ll be the first to know.
A few things I think can help are: talking about it, transforming fear into curiosity, and allowing yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Saying thoughts out loud releases their power. Getting curious inspires you to ask questions, experiment, and ask for help. And feeling what you’re feeling helps you to resist the temptation to tuck everything away where it tends to build and build.
I also want to spread the message to other helpers, healers, and heart givers – it’s okay for you to not be okay. It’s okay for the advice you give to sometimes slip by without penetrating your own mind. I’ve given myself permission to have ‘off’ days and I invite you to do that too. Let’s be kind to ourselves when we’re caught not practicing what we preach because the truth is, we’d probably tell someone else to be kind to themselves in that moment too.
Keep an eye out for more posts soon. I’m happy to be back.